Friday, October 30, 2009

So last week I decided to start reposting a series I wrote before anyone was really reading this blog. It is kind of funny and needed to be updated slightly. In the comments someone (It's always Candy who asks/says weird and inappropriate sounding without actually being inappropriate things) suggested that I should write about underwear. I put a poll up and as of today most people want to know where I stand … er sit on the subject.

I firmly believe that a youth pastor must wear underwear at all times they are in public. Commando is not an option. This is because of the distinct possibility of pranks that might involve pantsing. Trust me, no one want to see that happen.

Beyond that there are some options to think about. First is the age versus wearability of the underwear. As a guy I can assure you that the older and more worn a pair of underwear are the more comfortable they are. Threadbare is just another way of saying favorite pair. The curve established by this causal relationship will show that new underwear can never be as comfortable as well worn underwear, and when you follow the pattern out underwear that have worn into non existence are actually the most comfortable underwear a person can ever wear. This presents a bit of a paradox and conflicts with rule number one so as an addendum to rule number one I would say that when a pair had become so worn that there is more holes than fabric they are not to be worn in public.

Next one must consider the boxers v. brief argument. Generally I would say that a YP must wear boxers because ain't nobody wanna see you in your whity tighties. (See reasoning for rule number one).

Finally, having decided on boxers please remember that if you are on an event where you might be seen in your underwear by guys in the same room as you, then do not pack anything you do not want to be teased about. If you are comfortable with comments about the design of your lipstick or heart underwear then go for it, but don't be surprised when the guys steal them from your suitcase and hand them on the church van antenna. Also don't be surprised if I am the one that encouraged them to do that. It's my spiritual gift.